Friday, February 29, 2008
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Friday, February 15, 2008
1. Eat more chocolate.
2. Eat even more chocolate.
3. Assiduously follow instructions in points 1 & 2.
Am currently reading David Davidar's The Solitude of Emperors (his take on communalism), and honestly, it wouldn't be such a bad thing if the end of the world was nigh! Too bad the satellite is merely the size of a bus.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
As I write this, hospitals in the city are gearing up their OPDs to treat battered adults who are caught clutching teddy bears. More importantly, they’re also brushing up on the Hiemlich Manoeuvre to save poor innocent women from choking to death on diamond rings deviously planted in pastries/cocktails. Tell me again, why do men do this?
Ah well, love hurts.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
The most exciting piece of news in the papers today is that a new lizard species has been discovered in Satara (Hemidactylus Sataraensis, if you must know!). These newly discovered darlings have overshadowed the ridiculous hysteria over the lesser Thackeray's imminent(?) arrest, proving that some reptiles are decidedly more charming than others. I frankly don't give a shit if the rabble rouser is arrested or not- who cares, he'll be let out in half a second anyway. Maharashtra Chief Minister Vilasrao Deshmukh is a weedy wishy washy wimp, incapable of saying boo to a goose (not even a dead, roasted, honey-glazed one!). And as for Deputy CM RR Patil, he'd only have taken stern action if the lesser Thackeray had claimed that North Indian cabbies moonlighted as transexual bar dancers! Which means Thackeray would still be out holding his head up high, looking comically stern and earnest, as is his wont. @$#%^*((*&$#@!!! And @#$ %^& $^ for good measure!
Monday, February 11, 2008
Here he viciously attacks Toad the Wet Sprocket (but not as viciously as he may have attacked Barry Manilow- go on, read the article to find out! It's hilarious.). I don't just love Dave Barry for his sense of humour, we evidently share the same taste in music too. Remember America (the band, not the country)? Not hot, but not crap either, it's the 'easy listening' music stuff. Except for that dreadful muskrat song and Tin Man (shudder)-you have just got to read Barry on the yucky muskrat song, he's brilliantly caustic! And my sister breaks into angry red spots if she so much as hears the opening bars of You can do Magic- but I can deal with it. Why, I even went for their concert in Mumbai. Though I was shocked when some friends invited me to sneak a swig of vodka in their car- good heavens, you don't knock back booze before an America concert, you drink chocolate milkshake! Naturally, I refused-I have principles, I do!
Saturday, February 9, 2008
P.S. Have to guiltily confess that I've written on the lesser Thackeray too, but since it's for a monthly, it won't be out till next month. So you've been spared, lucky you!