Wednesday, August 24, 2011

India against Blackmailers, Dictators, Annarchists & Fasters

I've had it up to here with the blackmail, mass hysteria and mobocracy unleashed by the India against Corruption team. First they try to shove a bill down our throat by blackmail rather than serious debates in Parliament, then they lie with grandiose statements like, "All of India is with Anna" - the morons can't even do simple mathematics. Even worse I've been innundated with annoying text messages urging me to join their idiotic marches and yell that jingoistic Wagah border nonsense.

Hello, I'm as anti-corruption as they come and I do want a Lokpal bill but not their flawed one - and definitely not this slimy way.

After their movement dies down, here are a few suggestions for books they can write:

1. My Experiments with Blackmail by Anna Hazare

2. Get back at your former boss by making an old man starve to death by Arvind Kejriwal & Kiran Bedi.

And as I write this, I'm aware that supporters of this creepy movement will hurl insults at me. But I don't care - I live in a democracy and I too have the right to air my views. Meanwhile, please donate your old civics textbooks to India against Corruption. The poor things haven't a clue about parliamentary democracy, tsk.

Monday, August 8, 2011

Great-Grandson of Godawful Poetry Fortnight

(Go to for the sordid details)
And now (after I clear my throat) my humble contribution for 2011:

Cockroaches to the left of me, cockroaches to the right,
My blood it froze like popsicles at such a fearsome sight.
“Oh Romeo, Romeo wherefore art thou,”
I screamed like Bianca Castafiore in my fright.
The sod was dive-bombing angry birds, and ignored my plight.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

How not to turn a Bloody Mary into a Bloody Mess

Rule no. 1: Stay calm - I learnt this the hard way.
My hands were trembling with so much excitement as I prepared the mix, so inadvertently half a bottle of Worcestershire sauce sloshed into it. What I'm drinking now is not Bloody Mary. And, interestingly, not exactly a Bloody Mess either. I call it a Wooster Booster. It has its charms.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Hell & damnation!

Changed my hotmail user id to gmail on the blog and now it says that my 2008 blog began today and my profile data et cetera have vanished! Really annoying. Fortunately the dates on all my posts remain the same, whew. Sometimes, just sometimes, I hate technology.